Meet Mr. Mom
By: Patrick Barbieri
Issue date: 5/21/08 Section: Columns
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And he is pregnant.
Born a female, Beatie underwent sexual reassignment surgery and hormonal therapy to legally become a male, but left his female genitalia intact. Last year, he and his wife Nancy (a biological female who had a hysterectomy years before) decided they wanted a child. Now, the bearded Beatie is pregnant with a baby girl and is due in July.
"How does it feel to be a pregnant man? Incredible," wrote Beatie in his first-person article "Labor of Love."
"Despite the fact my belly is growing with a new life inside me, I am stable and confident being the man that I am. I will be my daughter's father, and Nancy will be her mother. We will be a family," he wrote.
Ugh … this scenario is disturbing in so many ways. Where to even begin?
For the record, I truly sympathize for anyone who is or has struggled to define their gender or sexuality. Finding one's place in this society of confusing ideals and expectations is difficult enough as it is.
That said, Beatie made the decision long ago to legally become a male. Isn't it obvious to people that becoming a male means sacrificing the biological advantages of being female, and vice versa? It should be.
The fact is by becoming a male, Beatie and his wife have been afforded more than 1,100 federal rights and received considerable benefits only available to traditional couples and not to same-sex marriages, domestic partnerships or civil unions.
But now, Beatie wants to reap the benefits of womanhood by bearing a child. By jumping back and forth between genders, Beatie is essentially exploiting the characteristics of both genders that best serve him.
But my loathing for Beatie's decision goes much deeper than mere legalities.
What health risks do being born to a transgender man pose to a baby? Sure, Beatie is receiving medical assistance with his pregnancy, but finding reliable help under his circumstances is difficult even according to him.
Beatie underwent bimonthly testosterone injections that helped him grow a beard and prevented him from having a menstrual cycle for more than eight years. He claims his body regulated itself four months after stopping the treatment, but Beatie and his wife were unable to find a doctor to inseminate him. What did they do instead? They did it on their own at home using cryogenic sperm purchased from a sperm bank.




Viewing Comments 1 - 2 of 2
Jenna Ray
posted 5/22/08 @ 3:14 PM PST
While I agree with your concern for the baby's health, as most fetuses are not exposed to as much testosterone as this one will be during early development, your ideas regarding gender roles are outdated, at best, and more "disturbing" than a man having a baby. (Continued…)
Ed
posted 6/04/08 @ 11:50 PM PST
So... it's *Mr. Barbieri's* ideas that are "disturbing," comrade Ray?
Someone PLEASE pass me the morphine. The more the better.
I commend Mr. Barbieri on the candor and clarity he displayed by publishing his column. (Continued…)
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